Re: [guadec-list] Press Release GUADEC 2006 - Final englisch+german

[Josep Puigdemont <josep puigdemont gmail com>]

El dg 18 de 06 del 2006 a les 12:07 +0200, en/na Thomas Keup va
escriure:
> Hi Josep:
> 
> The original version is english!

Thanks, Thomas!

I'd like to give some comments about the note (I used the file:
http://guadec.org/files/pressRelease20060619_en.odt). Sorry if this
comes too late.

I'm not a native English, so probably some things I comment are due to
my lack of knowledge, in which case I apologize in advance, but I
thought I had to raise the question anyway. Some other are just picky.
I hope not no be too harsh, I do appreciate very much all the good work
you've all done with the press release! But as with everything, there is
room for improvements.

I've prefixed original sentences with "***" (I was too lazy to type
<quote> tags ;-)

Here we go.

This should probably have to be rephrased:

*** "the week will be one of the leading developers conferences around
Free and Open Source software this year."

I understand as if it said that "the week" will be a "conference". I
guess it should say that "during the week there will be a conference",
or something similar.


When introducing Jeff Waugh, we do it talking about his work for Ubuntu,
at Canonical. It would probably make more sense to introduce him as the
president of the GNOME foundation, and later give some more detailed
background info about him, if that's required (as much as I like Jeff, I
also think there is too much info about him in the press release).

On a side note, the Spanish translation mentions that Canonical is a
company founded by the "famous" Mark Shuttlework, whilst this is not
present in the original English version. Although maybe this is on
purpose, and it might just be a localization thing, maybe Mark is very
well known in Spain, and that might give a PR boost (in which case I'd
keep it).


I don't understand this paragraph:

*** "Following keynotes at GUADEC 2006 concering about „Creating
Passionate Users“, „Freedom: Reality and Illusion“, „GNOME – How much
faster?“, „Big GNOME Deployments: the GnuLinEx and Guadalinex Use Cases“
and „ Free Software at Sun Microsystems“."

(there is also a typo: "concering" -> "concerning")

I also have trouble swallowing this sentence:
*** "The core slots are reporting about GNOME..."


I'm not sure if that's changed, but GUADEC is not only about developers,
but users as well. This sentence, while true, doesn't give the right
idea:
*** "GNOME Conference will be the get together of developers around
GNOME planet."

*** "Guys from more than 30 projects and teams will be in Vilanova,"
--> "Vilanova i la Geltrú"


BIG BIG TYPO:
*** "European delegations for GUADEC are applied from Check Republick"

Should be "Czech Republic"!!

Anyway, I'd rewrite it as:
"Delegations from all over the world are coming to the event. From
Europe we'll find representatives from the Czech Republic..."


*** "Up to 500 people will be guest"
There is no limit on the amount of people we'd like to host!!! I'd say
"At least 500 people...."

*** "Most of them are living together in bungalows at Vilanova Park"
This will make them think we all live our current lives in bungalows, I
think it should say: "Most of them will be staying together in bungalows
at Vilanova Park[, during the event]".

*** "About 50 of them will be sponsored participants"
Don't know if it should say "are sponsored", or "will be". I think they
already are sponsored, but of course, maybe they haven't got the money,
yet ;-)


I'll look at page two now.

Regards!

/Josep



> -----Ursprüngliche Nachricht-----
> Von: Josep Puigdemont <josep puigdemont gmail com>
> Gesendet: 18.06.06 11:39:17
> An: Thomas Keup <thomas keup gnome-de org>
> CC: guadec-list gnome org, jvazquez igalia com, qgil gnome org
> Betreff: Re: [guadec-list] Press Release GUADEC 2006 - Final englisch+german
> 
> 
> Hi,
> 
> Which version is the original one, Enlgish, Spanish or German?
> 
> /Josep
>