[Evolution] How to really Share calendars?

Using the latest Evolution with Fedora Core 6.   (2.8.3)  I've gotten the PDA/pilot synchronization
working individually.     I've managed to setup publishing of my calendar and my wife's
calendar, who is also using Evolution (2.8.3) about 8 feet away at her desk.
But my goal was to have a calendar on my PDA that I could actually use, one on
which people can send meeting invites to me, and one that reflects family
commitments as well.   What we were doing previously was a completely shared
calendar on Above&Beyond, which was hot-sync'd to each PDA.   We could both add
calendar entries at our desk, although we couldn't add anything from the PDA. 

The presumption of Evolution seems to be that you can publish your calendar,
others can view your published calendar, but others cannot change your
calendar. Also, you can only hot-sync a single calendar to your PDA.    And if
you hot-sync'd your Personal calendar to the PDA, then manually also pushed
your Wife's calendar out to the PDA, the next time you hot-sync your PDA all
the stuff on your Wife's calendar is going to come back and get stuffed on your
Personal Calendar.  (Or does it?  Does the calendar data on the PC have
information in it to tie it back to which Evolution calendar it came from?)  So
there you are, in the orthodontist's office, trying to make a followup
appointment for your son and you don't have all the calendar stuff you need. 

I'll admit - corporate users might not have this need.  Unless they have
children.   and a life. 

I was wondering if it would be possible to dink around with hard links under
~/.evolution/calendar and actually force both our userids on the same computer
to use the same calendar.   Would this be safe?   Or would that have two copies
of the Evolution Data Server both thinking they were the only one updating the
calendar file and we'd end up hammering the calendar and the last update would
win and wipe out an earlier update.   Obviously, we only would want to do that
on calendar data, not email. 

I guess one halfway solution is to never add appointments on the PDA, and
manually push both of the calendars to it.   I was hoping we could get to
something more functional. 

I think there's a need for something similar regarding Contacts. Our handling of
names and phone numbers is a shambles, because we both can't add contacts on a PDA
or desktop and have it sync to both of us.  In theory one can just fire up an 
LDAP server and do that.   Turns out that's a bit daunting for the average user 
who has no other need to configure LDAP. 

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