[release-notes/gnome-3-10] elaborate the index page

[Allan Day <allanday src gnome org>]

commit b957c220444046e5ab7c3386a13f016d3e61ad8e
Author: Allan Day <allanpday gmail com>
Date:   Mon Sep 16 11:04:43 2013 +0100

    elaborate the index page

 help/C/index.page |   25 ++++++++++---------------
 1 files changed, 10 insertions(+), 15 deletions(-)
---
diff --git a/help/C/index.page b/help/C/index.page
index 8301df8..d452463 100644
--- a/help/C/index.page
+++ b/help/C/index.page
@@ -26,27 +26,25 @@
 
   <title>Introducing GNOME &gnomeversion;</title>
 
-  <p>The GNOME community is proud to present GNOME &gnomeversion;. This new release features numerous new 
features as well as a host of smaller enhancements.</p>
+  <p>The GNOME project is proud to present GNOME &gnomeversion;. The release comes six months after 
&lastversion;, and contains &gitcommits; changes by approximately &gitauthors; contributors. It contains 
major new features as well as a large collection of smaller enhancements. &gnomeversion; provides an improved 
experience for users, as well as new capabilities for application developers.</p>
 
-  <p>&gnomeversion; is the result of 6 months of work by the GNOME Project and contains &gitcommits; 
contributions by approximately &gitauthors; people. We think that it is the best version of GNOME to date.</p>
-
-  <p>Here are some of the improvements that can be found in the new release.</p>
+  <p>New features in GNOME &gnomeversion; include:</p>
 
   <section id="wayland">
     <title>Next Stop Wayland</title>
-    <p>&gnomeversion; brings experimental support of Wayland, the next generation display server. This 
allows for a smoother experience, improved performance and a cleaner architecture going forward. For more 
details, see the developers section.</p>
+    <p><app>Wayland</app> is the next generation GNOME display server. It promises to deliver improved 
graphics performance. &gnomeversion; introduces experimental <app>Wayland</app> support, and is an important 
milestone on the road to full adoption. This allows developers to try GNOME running under <app>Wayland</app>, 
and will allow work towards complete Wayland adoption to move forward.</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/wayland.png"/>
   </section>
 
   <section id="system-status">
     <title>Integrated System Status</title>
-    <p>GNOME &gnomeversion; features a redesigned system status area. This allows you to see the status of 
your system in a single glance.</p>
+    <p>GNOME &gnomeversion; features a new, redesigned system status area. In previous versions, the system 
status area was made up by a series of menus in the corner of the top bar. The new system status area 
replaces this with a single menu. This allows you to quickly see an overview of the state of your device, 
also allows a more focused top bar which only displays information that you care about, a consistent approach 
for the lock and login screens, and an enhanced aeroplane mode. In addition, it provides easier mouse 
interaction, privacy improvements, and a new screen brightness slider.</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/status-menu.png"/>
   </section>
 
   <section id="header-bars">
     <title>Header Bars</title>
-    <p>A new aspect of application design in GNOME has been introduced in &gnomeversion;: header bars. These 
consolidate an application's title bar and toolbar into a single bar. This reduces the amount of application 
chrome, leaving more screen space devoted to content, and allows more dynamic applications which might 
contain different views. This change also ensures that window close buttons are consistently presented, 
irrespective of whether the window is maximized or not.</p>
+    <p>A new interface element has been introduced in &gnomeversion;: header bars. These merge applications' 
title bars and toolbars into a single element, reducing the amount of interface chrome within each window, 
and gives more screen space to the content within the window. Header bars also allows more dynamic 
application interfaces, whose controls adjust to the current view. They also ensures that window close 
buttons are always present, irrespective of whether the window is maximized or not.</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/header-bars.png"/>
   </section>
 
@@ -58,22 +56,19 @@
 
   <section id="software">
     <title>Software</title>
-    <p>In &gnomeversion;, GNOME is introducing the brand new <app>Software</app> application. 
<app>Software</app> provides an integrated place to do all your software related tasks, like browsing, 
installing and removing applications, and updating your system's software.</p>
+    <p>GNOME &gnomeversion; includes a brand new application for finding and installing applications and for 
updating your software. Called <app>Software</app>, in provides an integrated place to do all your software 
related tasks, like browsing, installing and removing applications, and viewing and installing software 
updates. We have lots of plans for the future of <app>Software</app>, including user ratings and comments for 
applications and screenshots of applications that you might want to install.</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/gnome-software.png"/>
   </section>
 
   <section id="new-apps">
     <title>New Application Bonanza</title>
-    <p>Notes, Music, Maps.</p>
+    <p>GNOME's mission to provide a high quality set of modern applications continues in GNOME 
&gnomeversion;. In addition to <app>Photos</app> and <app>Software</app>, there is a whole collection of 
other new applications being introduced, includings <app>Notes</app>, <app>Music</app> and 
<app>Maps</app>.</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/gnome-music.png"/>
-    <p>Preview application in 3.10
-Allows you to listen to music and browse it based on Artist, Album or Track. Currently it can only play 
music from your local hard drive, but for the next release the team is planning UPNP support and fetching 
music from online sources.</p>
+    <p><app>Music</app> is planned to be the default audio player application for GNOME 3. It is featuring 
in GNOME &gnomeversion; as a technology preview. It provides a clean and focused interface for browsing your 
music collection according to Artist, Album or Track. Support for playing music on media servers (via UPNP) 
and fetching music from online sources is planned for the future.</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/gnome-maps.png"/>
-    <p>Preview application release.
-Based on collaborative Openstreetmap database, made by hundreds of thousands of people across the globe
-Look up places by searching for names, such as  "Helsinki", "Empire state building", "Statue of Liberty" 
etc, or by phrases such as "Pubs near Main Street, Boston", "Hotels in New York" etc. More info/reference for 
search phrases here: http://wiki.openstreetmap.org/wiki/Nominatim/Special_Phrases</p>
+    <p><app>Maps</app> is a new map viewer application for GNOME. Based on collaborative <link 
href="http://www.openstreetmap.org/";>OpenStreetMap</link> data, which is contributed to by hundreds of 
thousands of people across the globe, it allows you to browse street maps and satelitte images. 
<app>Maps</app> allows you to search for the names of towns, cities and landmarks, or for places of interest 
such as "cafes near Main Street, Boston" or "Hotels in New York".</p>
     <media type="image" src="figures/gnome-notes.png"/>
-    <p>This note taking application, formerly known as Bijiben now have support for storing notes on a 
Owncloud instance.</p>
+    <p><app>Notes</app> was originally introduced in GNOME &lastversion; as <app>Bijiben</app>. Since then 
it has matured, and has gained the ability to store notes using <link 
href="http://owncloud.org/";>ownCloud</link>. <app>Notes</app> provides a simple interface for writing, 
browsing and searching notes, and automatically saves your work, so you don't lose it.</p>
   </section>
 
   <section id="more">